Everything you needed to know, you learned from Daddy

I'm the proud father of two boys, Tyler (4) and Colby (2). You can see the handsome devils to the left. It's an incredible thing to be a Dad as some of you know. When I sit and watch them learn things from their mother or me, it's amazing the amount of influence we can have on them. It's also amazing in a sad way, to see the influence that others have on them. They aren't by any means criminals at this point don't get me wrong. But if you are a parent, you know what I mean. You almost want to put them in a bubble so you are the only one who can show and teach them things. Of course, we know that's not reality or even helpful. Part of growing up, is learning on your own. Hopefully the teachings they receive at home and church will be the cornerstones and the benchmark (to use a corporate word) they will use to bounce all other ideas off of. If they get asked to do something that goes against their personal beliefs grain, I pray they will immediately recognize it and fight against it.

But I'm also a parent who doesn't want to raise cautious and timid kids, afraid to try new things and even mess up from time to time. That's what will shape their lives. All of you parents know what I mean. I do know that there are a few basic things that I want to say "Daddy taught you how to do that" or "My Daddy told me that boys aren't supposed to act like that - they are supposed to act like this". Oh, how I long for the day when I hear Tyler and Colby say those words. I believe this what I call Active Parenting!! It's so easy to sit back and do nothing and let them learn on their own or from others. But I must be deliberate as their Daddy to help them learn new things from a Godly persepective as well as basic manly necessities.

Here are a few things (ok, it's alot) that have made "The List". Oh, and yes, it is an actual list I keep and add to from time to time. Those of you who know me aren't surprised! Ok, here you go:

1. Live your life with Christ as your example
2. Know how to change a tire
3. Know how to check oil, brake fluid, etc.
4. Know how to type - take typing lessons
5. Know your directions (North, South, East, West)
6. Know how to get around places / know where you are and be good with giving directions
7. Know how to balance a checkbook / prepare a budget / be money savvy
8. Know CPR
9. Know a 2nd language (including Sign Language)
10. Keep up with technology/ PC skills
11. Have good phone etiquette at home or work
12. Have good manners
13. Take responsibility for your actions / have high degree of integrity
14. Use "Yes Sir" and "Yes Mam" when appropriate
15. Be nice to checkout people and waitstaff
16. Tip appropriately / know how to calculate 15 and 20%
17. Be generous when appropriate
18. Offer to do little things that make a difference
19. Remember the details
20. Be a leader among your peers/friends. Help set the agenda rather than follow someone else's. If you do, people will follow the Christ-like example you are setting
21. But remember, to be a good leader you must first learn to be a good follower
22. Respect older people - be kind and helpful
23. Use Mr and Mrs when appropriate with older people - until they tell you otherwise
24. Know when to use Mrs. vs. Miss vs. Ms.
25. Make eye contact / be an active listener and have good listening skills
26. Ask about something that's important to other person - don't just talk about yourself
27. Be a good and mature driver - be responsible behind the wheel
28. Place family as a priority - maintain strong relationships with your parent, siblings, in-laws, aunts, uncles and cousins as you get older
29. Market yourself for future opportunities
30. Respect your elders
31. Respect, embrace and value traditions and heritage (i.e. TAMU, ACU, Acapella music, family)
32. Don't be shy or intimidated - be bold and confident while having compassion for others
33. Don't be afraid to take a risk - Win or lose you'll always win by learning something from it !!
34. Don't get into debt - the less you are bound to others, the more decisions you can make financially that impact others.

35. Always be a helper to your parents, grandparents, friends, neighbors, and teachers.
36. Be an easy person be around - Be a person that other people want to be around. Not someone who drives people crazy !!

37. Open the doors for people, especially ladies.
38. Learn the value of an internship
39. Learn the idea of dating/ courtship [Tommy Nelson series]
40. Value of romance
41. How to iron clothes and do laundry
42. How to use power tools
43. How to cook
44. Difference in flat head and Phillips screwdriver
45. Remember people's names when you meet them - this is a gift!

46. Stay healthy - eat right, work out

47. Prepare financially to take care of your parents

48. Embrace the importance of scrapbooks (this will please your Mom!)

49. Be kind and fun around kids - but be a good influence

50. Volunteer at Christian camps to help you grow!

That's a start!! Please send me your "lists" as well so I can add them to mine.

God bless you all,

SJ